Saturday, June 30, 2012

Where to start and what to do?

I feel like there is so much that needs to be done and so much that I have to get together for Lorial that I am totally overwhelmed and unable to rest my mind.  What will she do after the Partial Hospitalization Program if school is not in yet? How will I get her IEP done before shcool starts? Where will she go to school? How will she get to that school?  How long can I keep going in so late and leaving so early to work?  I just feel like I am in so far over my head.  Every time I get frustrated or upset by all of this, I think of what she must be experiencing and how horrible it must be for her.  She is so amazing and strong and I wish I could take all of this away from her because I would gladly carry the load on myself.  I know that we will get through this, but going through it is almost too much to bare.  I wish there were someone I could lean on or turn to to tell me what I should do or to carry the weight of all this from time to time so I could take a break.  I don't call and unload all this crap on friends because it is just too much and I hate hearing myself talk about it.  I will lean on God and have faith that with his strength we will be able to move forward and find peace.

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